On my way back from LA in December, I saw a beautiful woman with her head looking down, holding hands tightly with a man at the airport. She had long hair that bounced, skin that glowed and clothes that fit like a glove. Once I realized the dude was John Legend, I realized I also just saw Chrissy Teigen.
They were without their daughter Luna and followed by a couple of security guards. I almost missed them staring down at my cell phone.
Like Beyonce, I feel like you can’t really say you don’t like Chrissy especially if you are a mom. She says what she thinks, she’s pretty open and gets a lot of shit on social media for it. To be honest, I admire her openness and quick one liners. She doesn’t care if people agree with her. For the record, I like and respect both ladies.
Teigen is on the cover of Glamour Magazine this month and has something to confess… she has postpartum depression.
I had everything I needed to be happy. And yet, for much of the last year, I felt unhappy. What basically everyone around me—but me—knew up until December was this: I have postpartum depression. How can I feel this way when everything is so great? I’ve had a hard time coming to terms with that, and I hesitated to even talk about this, as everything becomes such a “thing.” During pregnancy, what I thought were casual comments about IVF turned into headlines about me choosing the sex of my daughter. And I can already envision what will be said about me after this admission. But it’s such a major part of my life and so, so many other women’s lives. It would feel wrong to write anything else. So here goes.
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I also just didn’t think it could happen to me. I have a great life. I have all the help I could need: John, my mother (who lives with us), a nanny. But postpartum does not discriminate. I couldn’t control it. And that’s part of the reason it took me so long to speak up: I felt selfish, icky, and weird saying aloud that I’m struggling. Sometimes I still do.
You can read her full essay here.
I did not have postpartum depression but between days 5 and 10 I definitely had the baby blues bad. They did continue for about a month or two but to a lesser degree. My entire world changed overnight and I resented the fact that Nick’s felt barely changed at all. I didn’t have help and I no longer could come and go as I pleased. It was a tough transition and I felt chained to my house. It all subsided once Tommy was 12 weeks and I was able to go longer stretches without nursing him and could put him in babysitting at the gym for some me time.
I think exercise personally really helped me. That and getting outside. I was lucky not to have a terribly cold winter the year Tommy was born.
I think it’s interesting to hear how someone like Teigen who had all the help, had/has postpartum depression. I think it’s easy to throw shade at people while sitting behind a computer, but it’s just as easy to portray a perfect life.
It just goes to show, PPD really can happen to anyone.
I so relate to resenting hubs for his life not having changed! I call it postpartum rage! My LO is 4 months now so it is easier than those first 12 weeks but being a mom is so tough!
Lol PPR. Ain’t that the truth though, it is freaking hard.
One of the hardest things I’ve ever dealt with was postpartum depression. I didn’t realize it at the time how much I was dealing with it, and looking back I regret not asking for help. I was putting a ton of pressure on myself to be “The Perfect Mom” and it literally just swung me in the opposite direction. Hormones and depression can be a really scary thing, but I think its made me a better person. I’ve learned to ask for help when I need it and to take care of my mental health just as much as my daughters’!
The first year of parenthood is intense. It has encompassed some of my highest highs and my lowest lows. Like you, I found exercise to help tremendously. I didn’t experience PPD or the baby blues, but I did struggle to find a sense of normalcy. As my son approaches his first birthday, I finally feel adjusted and proud of the way we’re raising him. As the old saying goes, “Nothing worth having comes easy.” Motherhood is tough!
Thank you for sharing! I enjoy reading your blog.