This is not a baby sleep site but I keep getting questions on Instagram about Connor’s sleep as we are just about to hit 5 months.
I first shared our plan in my first baby sleep training post. I wrote that over a month ago!
Then I shared another update on our sleep training just before Connor got the Croup, a nasty cough that required my first trip to the ER as a mom as well as Connor’s.
Once Connor got sick, we had to put our sleep training on hold. I moved him back into our room, he was up again every 90 minutes and it was hard on everyone. Croup is essentially baby laryngitis so we couldn’t even hear him cry but I just felt so bad for him.
To recap, we used a Boston Naps sleep consultant. As part of the package, you get a day of texting and also a follow up phone call after the initial hour long phone call. I was hesitant to make both because I knew I had the tools to get Connor to sleep, I just wasn’t implementing them.
Ellen, the sleep consultant, is amazing. She tells you what you need to hear, not what you want. She tailors her advice to your situation. We live in the city. The boys are/will share a room. I am breastfeeding and still was in the middle of the night.
After my follow up call with Ellen, I was empowered to not soothe Connor in the middle of night by nursing but encourage him to find a way to self soothe and fall back asleep on his own which is the goal of sleep training.
He woke up at 3 am one night and cried for awhile but eventually fell back asleep. The next night it was 4 am. Again, same thing, cried but fell back asleep. Then it became 5 am, same thing, woke up and fell back asleep. If you’re doing the 10-20-40 rule as mentioned in this post, you do not want to go in if the baby wakes up after 5 am unless you want them to wake up at 5 am. Ellen suggested we wait until 6:30 am or after to start the day.
Ok so after committing to Ellen’s plan, all last week Connor slept through the night. I did not nurse him.
He slept essentially 6:30/7 to 6:30 am. He also did a HUGE long morning nap in his crib. He napped from 8:30/9 to 11 am. This is normal for most people but not for me. Tommy NEVER napped in his crib and he never napped for very long.
So what did we finally do differently…
#1. We moved Connor back into the same room as Tommy after he recovered from the Croup.
Connor goes to sleep before Tommy so even if he cries a little, it’s ok but usually he does not. Tommy goes to bed later and knows to be quiet but occasionally does wake him up. Connor falls back asleep.
#2. I chose to cut out the middle of the night feed cold turkey. Sure I woke up drenched two mornings but by the 3rd or 4th day, my milk regulated itself and I stopped producing so much at night. I was told to set up my pump by my bed and just pump a little “to take the edge off” but I didn’t need to. For Connor it took about 4-5 days and he was off the feed.
*When I took Connor to NYC, I did nurse him in the middle of the night to not upset hotel neighbors and now have started “training” again to get rid of it.*
#3. If Connor wakes up in the middle of the night, we can go in and check on him but we chose not do. It just made it harder for everyone. Tommy comes into our room if Connor wakes him up which is fine with us right now. I do go in on occasion if he’s crying for longer than 20 minutes which RARELY has happened.
*When I brought him to NYC, it totally goofed up our success so I definitely nursed him in the middle of the night in the hotel as well as didn’t let him cry very long. This meant I was up every 90 minutes – 3 hours.*
So we found success, then I brought Connor with me on a work trip and I goofed it all up. We had to start again and already seeing progress. Connor and I cannot be in the same room at bedtime because he smells my milk I swear.
The naps are getting longer as well. Connor regularly does a really long morning nap still which is incredible since Tommy never was able to put himself back to sleep after a 45-minute sleep cycle. Was it me or was it Tommy? I don’t know.
Hopefully this is the last update I share. If in doubt, cry it out seems to be the advice.
I do not believe in the studies that show negative consequence for babies who are sleep trained emotionally. I mean, how hard would it be to account for all the variables???
If you have a question leave it below, but really, call Boston Naps!